In the beginning, God covered the earth with an abundance of green, yellow and red vegetables so that Man and Woman would lead long and healthy lives.
Using God’s bountiful gifts, Satan created ice cream and said, “You want fudge with that?” And Man said, “Yes”, while Woman said, “I’ll have one too, with sprinkles,” and lo and behold they gained 20 kg.
And so God created the healthful yoghurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man had found so fair.
And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them, and Woman went from size 10 to size 16.
So God said, “Try my fresh green garden Salad.”
And Satan presented crumbled blue cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side, and Man and Woman unfastened their belts following their feast.
God then said, “I have sent you hearty and healthy vegetables and oil in which to cook them.”
And Satan brought forth deep fried squid rings, butter-dipped lobster chunks and fried chicken so big it needed its own platter. And Man’s cholesterol went through the roof.
God brought them running shoes, and Satan introduced cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.
And Man and Woman sat before the flickering light and started wearing stretchy Lycra jogging suits.
And God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.
And Satan said, “You want fries with that?” And Man replied, “Yes, and super-size them.” And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple by-pass surgery. Satan chuckled and created . . . the Health System.